Here I sit ... writing at last. And I only have Plan B to thank.... oh, and my dear friends at book club who spent all of the first Tuesday of last month grilling me as to why I don't write. (we meet the first Tuesday of every month).
I thank Plan B as I have been following her for some weeks now. I posted some comments on her blog today as "Anonymous" - which went down a storm (not!). I later outed myself, as have nothing to hide, and only everything to gain..
I thank my dear friends at book club (where NO books are ever discussed - just girls having fun over a desparately fattening curry....), as they have been on my case for yonks to write.
This is, in fact, a weird karmic culmination of events...
....but whatever. I am here.
Hubby has helped me set up this blog tonight, as I am hitherto technologically inept. (and he came up with the name - ha ha - he has a sense of humour. If only it were so easy to say "I'm a Mommy... Get me out of here" and actually escape. But no - like the rest of you, I wake up in Ground Hog day every morning to the wailing of "my nappy's wet" or the quiet grunts for food (more on my children's very different personalities later I am sure).
I had a hell of a day today. Nothing to write home about really, just what we are all used to - whinging, whining, crying and ultimately shouting .... on my part (no, I am not proud).
Oh, and did I mention my insecurities at the (nursery) school gate - why won't that mother talk to me? or the fact that I now think J is stressed as she has eczema on her "creases" (elbows/inner arms/behind the knees) or that I am continually apologising for J's behaviour, or that even though the sun shone today, the little outside thermometer thingie we have in our "garden" (read shoe box) only reached 4 degrees C????
But as I sipped glass of wine number four this evening, (not the norm and I hope not too shocking), and reflected on my day and this "wierd culmination of events", I decided today was the day... I will start a blog.
I may talk to myself for the next few weeks/months/years... but no change there really. At the moment I feel as though no-one listens to me, so talking to myself is cool.
This Mommy thing is the ultimate cliche - tiring, rewarding, boring, fascinating, draining, uplifting, soul detroying and above all for me - ALL CONSUMING.
That last part is the part I need to work on most. I worked out that since my son O was born six months ago, I have had 27 "childfree" daylight hours, 8 of which were at the hairdresser and 4 of which were having pedicures. So I have had 15 childfree daylight hours in six months.
Poor you! I hear you shout.
Well, yes, poor me, cos as an ex-career-woman-used-to-earning-a-crust-used-to-have-a-brain/sense-of-humour/sense-of-style/body/life, I am one frustrated cookie.
So. I join the sisterhood, here in blogosphere, predominantly to find solace in my own thoughts, support from all of you fighting the same fight and to keep my dear friends in book club off my back for another month!!
I look forward to the privilage of sharing, caring and learning with you all.